Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Life's Transitions Are No Simple Task

If there is one thing that I have learned from my life this far is that it is always changing and changes can be WAY hard. I have always been the girl that hated moving up a grade in school, starting some new hobby, and meeting new people. I still fear walking into a room of people (doesn't matter if I know them or not) by myself and have them all staring at me. Sometimes I just fear new experiences, no matter how great they can be.

Almost EVERY TIME I learn to love the new experience that I am in, it's just the transition that is the hardest part. Marriage has been a huge transitional stage in my life. While I was very confident in this transition and knew that I would be very happy with Jake, there definitely have been hard days. . .

It's amazing how I see hand of the Lord helping me out through my past transitions and my current ones. When I knelt across the alter from my sweetheart, I knew that I was making the right decision, and I knew that the Lord was with me. I could feel Him right there next to us, knowing that he will help us along our way. It was one of the most happiest moments in my life. Sometimes it's easy to forget the hand of the Lord after a long day of work and opening the empty fridge trying to figure out something to eat, while not having a desire to do anything but watch TV. Sometimes it's hard to acknowledge to the Lord on days like these.This is where our greatest amount of FAITH and DILIGENCE should kick in. Nothing takes true diligence until it becomes something that is hard to push through. I know countless times already I have lived below what I know the Lord would expect of me because I have felt too tired or too lazy.

It's amazing to see the blessings of the Lord when I give some effort to fulfill the many responsibilities that I have. Recently Jake and I were able to borrow another car for a while thanks to my loving parents, and we got a really good grant for school. Jake has also been an amazing blessing to me and serves me when I feel down after he has had a long day himself. Scriptures and prayer have also been great blessings to me to help keep a peaceful mood.

Even though transitions are hard, they are totally worth it when we push forth with continual diligence to complete the responsibilities that are laid before us. The Lord acknowledges our efforts and blesses us accordingly. We should never forget how he is always there helping us every step of the way.

Sunday, August 19, 2012

A Hidden Confession

It's amazing how some things can just hit you out of no where and how it becomes somewhat of a dream and something you hold dear. Over a year ago I was sitting in my room reading an article and then I had a thought pop in my head that has never seemed to stop appearing sense.

"You should become an inspirational writer"

Wow! I mean of course I have always dreamed of inspiring people, but doing it through writing seemed kind of strange to me. I liked writing in my journal and to myself, and never thought about writing for other people. Whenever I had to have someone read what I had written for a class I was always nervous and never felt like it was that good. I even shared with Jake this hidden dream of mine and while he is 100% supportive I am still nervous to have him hear my ideas. It's funny because most of my ideas pop in as we are laying in bed at night and I quickly grab my phone and write down a note and he always asks, "Another blog idea?"

This being said, it's been really hard for me to get started. I feel like the adversary gets in the way a lot and distracts me from this purpose. Lately, I have felt really distracted as my dream to become an inspirational writer has been more motivating to me. I have felt like life has been too busy and I have a million things to do, but no time to do it. One night I had a thought come to my mind.

"You are losing perspective"

I realized that I was pushing away the important things of my life because I was "too tired" or "too busy", but the main reason was that I have been "too selfish". While we are living for ourselves, we are also living for God and for other people. When it comes down to it, they should be our main focuses. A long time ago, a friend shared with me a story about how she was going to dedicate her life to others and not focus so much on herself. She helped me develop something I like to call the "No More Michelle Policy". When I am faced with a decision it becomes so much easier for me to make choices and to be happy when I realize that I am not just living life for myself. I have forgot about this policy from time to time and it has a direct effect on my mood and overall me!

When we lose sight on what really matters in our lives it is also harder to listen to the promptings of the spirit. I believe that our Heavenly Father gives us little jolts of remembrance to help us to refocus our lives on him and on his work. He is constantly reminding me of the covenants I have made with him and what I should be focusing on in my life, and it is so helpful when I feel like I am starting to lose sight. I love my Heavenly Father so much and I know that he will always be there for me throughout my life giving me the guidance I need to continue to live life to the very fullest!